If you’re not at all afraid of our nationally-ranked show choir then you’re not an inkling as smart as I’d thought you were. I once saw Patti LuPone in New York City and she congratulated me on my success in my last competition - I didn’t even have to say a word. And if that doesn’t scare you, well, you’re even less of a threat than I’d originally thought. Which is impressive, considering how little I’ve ever been threatened by the New Directions. Don’t write out your acceptance speech until you’re able to advance past Sectionals, even; it’s only a little while away, all things considered, and I’ll be betting that you’ll need every single second to thoroughly prepare. There’s a little rumor going around the show choir circuit that the New Directions hadn’t even finished writing their songs before last year’s performance. If that’s the truth, and I honestly don’t doubt it, then I’m not surprised you were all such a hot mess.
We make a point to smile because smiling is a sign of talent. There’s singing, there’s good singing, and then there’s good singing with a smile. And then, of course, there’s whatever you adhere to; from what I’ve seen of your numbers, it seems as if your director told you to don the dopiest looks possible throughout a song. It’s terrible etiquette. If we’re contesting which of the two of us is better liked by our peers, I’ll not throw in the towel. Though my record before high school might not say the same, since our first win in my freshman year my immense talent has drawn in many loyal friends and fans. I don’t even have to sport a bad attitude as you do to stand out from the crowd. Star quality is rare, but I have it in spades.
Just ‘cause we’re not scared, doesn’t mean we’re stupid. I mean, bitch please, we know how this works, you’re the top dogs in the show choir circuit, it doesn’t surprise me that Pattie LuPone recognised you. Vocal Adrenaline are the best… but soon that’s all gonna change. You and your mommy can gloat all you want about your wins in previous years, and you can laugh all you want about our performances and lack of preparation it doesn’t bother us. With help from Miss H, we’re gonna place first this year. We have better singers and our routines are gonna smash yours this year, without a doubt, ‘cause Mike and my girl Brittany are the ones choreographing it and whoever your paying to come up with yours ain’t got nothing on them.
C’mon Berry, that’s a downright lie right there. Those smiles look stupid; it’s honestly hilarious that you think it looks good, ‘cause to me it looks like you’re just tryin’ too damn hard. As I’ve said before, we’ve ditched our old director and Miss H totally knows what she’s doing, whatever dopey looks you’re talkin’ about won’t be there come Nationals. Seriously? You’re a joke, your talent can only take you so far with popularity Berry, take that away and you’re just a selfish and arrogant bitch with too much to say, I really wish someone on that team of yours would just step up and put a muzzle on you, for like 98% of the time. For me, things are different. I’m head bitch, I rule the school, I don’t give a damn what people think about me and that’s why people adore me. You could actually categorise the people in McKinley, there are two types, the ones that either want to be me, or the ones that want to be on me. So keep your ‘fans’, I’m happy with my followers.
Are you familiar with any Psychological fields of study, Lopez? I’m going to assume the answer is no. Regardless - you’re acting a lot like someone who’s afraid. And to cover up this fear, you’re accusing me of ’running scared.’ I can’t begin to blame you, as I’d be terrified of Vocal Adrenaline if I was in your club as well. My point being, your reverse speaking isn’t intimidating in the least, and if this is the scare tactic that the New Directions created, I suggest you strongly rethink the decision. Last year is by now old news. The ‘how’ of it isn’t important anymore, it’s the ‘what.’ And the what is that Vocal Adrenaline won, and has won for three years running. You don’t break a streak like that by a club powered on smiling faces, though it’s highly amusing to watch every one of you try. As empowering as it is that you embrace your terrible personality, it means nothing to me. If you’re looking for a speech on how impressive it is that you’ve managed to overcome adversity, you’ll not find it here.
Let’s get one thing straight, I’m a Lopez ad Lopez’s fear nothing. Definitely not a loud-mouth midget and her bunch of loser back-up dancers. If you think this is me trying to scare you, then you’re seriously under-estimating me, if I wanted to scare you, then you’d know about it, but where would be the fun in that? I’d prefer to beat you at Nationals and really make the suffering slow and long lasting. Maybe you should take another look, cause the New Directions aren’t the ones with smiling faces, that’s Vocal Adrenaline, I mean c’mon, your show smiles look so strained it’s painful to even look at. I don’t need to hear anything from you, people love me, I’m bitch and I own that. Why would I give a damn what you think? Answer: I don’t.
It’s amusing that you believe we’re afraid of you, of all things. Confused? More than a little. That you advanced past Regionals last year even was a complete fluke, which is perplexing enough. I don’t mean to disrespect you, I’m merely being honest with you, performer on performer. And the truth is, your Kumbaya Club doesn’t stand a chance against Oral Intensity this year, much less Vocal Adrenaline. Throw your personal blows as you wish, Lopez, nothing you can say will offend me. As a professional, I find it below me to stoop down and belittle your appearance or attitude. The latter of which, let me add, is not pleasant.
Keep saying you’re not afraid, but me and my Mexican third eye totally have a hunch you are, and that it’s the real reason you’re ‘keeping an eye on the competition’. Performer on performer, you’re goin’ down. Simple truth is, we weren’t ready for Regionals or Nationals last year. Our performances were pretty lame and that’s ‘cause had a lousy show choir director, but this year, Schuester’s gone and Miss Holiday’s taking us to the top, you guys don’t stand a chance. As for our out of competition communication, I’ll offend and belittle you all’s I like, I’ve gots no problem knocking your pathetic group of mouth-breathers down a peg or two. Honestly, I couldn’t give a damn if you don’t approve or whatever of my attitude, I’m a bitch and I embrace that.
Though it’s none of your business, I’ve followed you purely to have an in on your little Glee club. While Tumblr is intended for social reasons, mine is more devoted to keeping an eye on the ‘competition’ - not that the New Directions pose even the slightest threat to Vocal Adrenaline. I’m only responding to this post to humor you, really. You’re much easier to upset than I would have imagined, Lopez.
You really live in an egotistical world there, don’t you Midget? I mean, you’re just so freaking full of it. Though, my bet, is you’re following me ‘cause really you’re worried. My ‘little glee club’ came pretty damn close to winning Nationals last year, and you’re nervous. Don’t be embarrassed though or come up with lame excuses, I’d be kinda scared too, that is, if I weren’t on this years winning team already… Oh, I’m not upset, this is just how I talk to arrogant bitches like yourself, Berry.
Hey Hobbit, what the hell are you doin’? Did you gets yourself lost on the way to the Shire or something? Cause I don’t see any other reason why you’d think it was okay to be anywhere near me, even through the internet.
AU: Rachel and Santana are leads on rivaling college show choirs (idea credit)